Amnesia - Levihan
by indecisiveauthor
Summary: How did it end up like this, injured on a roof waiting for certain death? Well, that was her story to tell, if only she could remember it.
1. Chapter 1

How did it end up like this, injured on a roof waiting for certain death? Well, that was her story to tell, if only she could remember it.

**part one**

"Come on Levi, keep up!" shouted Hanji, as she took down her 5th titan that day, her horse ahead of Levi's.

"Oi! Shut it shitty glasses, I have taken down 7 titans so far today!" Levi responded.

"Yeah? Well then your horse is so far behind mine because you wait for all that blood that gets on you to evaporate, yes must be that, you are such a clean freak after all." she grinned at him as his horse caught up to hers, chuckling a bit.

"Well cleanliness might not be a concern for you since you are blind as a bat anyways but it is rather important for anyone of the general society. Now keep your eyes peeled, we are entering an old town where there are probably lots of titans"

"Not to your extent, Lance Corporal. And I am aware, not like I am going to go and get myself killed right?" Hanji chuckled.

"If you did that shitty glasses, I would murder you myself." Levi let out the ghost of a grin.

Hanji laughed at that, and turned to look at him again. "You know, despite you thinking otherwise, it is impossible to murder someone if they are already dead."

"Tch, no it's not, you still owe me a wedding shitty glasses."

"Yes, I suppose I do, as I do believe, it was scheduled for next month. Though only Erwin knows."

"Exactly, so do your best not to screw up and get killed here, this is the last mission before the wedding."

"Of course, of course! I would never dare screw up, you know that! Or at least out on the field, apparently I always screw up when it comes to hygiene."

"What kind of person doesn't wash their hair though shitty glasses? You are the only fucking person I know who refuses to do so, it had better be clean during the ceremony."

"I already promised I would, you promised to arrange to capture a titan the trip after as a reward if I do, which is plenty of motivati-"

**SUDDEN TITAN ATTACK!**

A 5 meter class titan kicked Hanji's horse, sending her flying. Even using her 3d maneuver gear she got injured, landing on the roof of a building tall enough to offer some protection.

Levi quickly dispatched the titan, and flew over to her.

"Idiot, I told you to watch out, are you okay?" His face was a mask, but she had learned how to see under it, and could see the concern for her.

"I will be fine, broken arm possibly, maybe my leg and foot too, but it is not too serious, I managed to prevent anything worse." She was lying through her teeth, it was probably much worse, her head was bleeding, and she hurt like hell all over, but best not to let him know that.

"Even so, we won't be able to move you without a cart, I will signal the main group to come, and ward off the titans in the meantime." He fired a flare, signaling that they needed to be picked up.

"Righty-o captain!" She grinned through the pain, and watched as he took off. The titans had seen Hanji falling, and could probably smell her dirty hair a mile away, therefore many were starting to come near.

He spun like a beyblade, slashing and cutting into the skin of titans, chopping out the napes of their necks brutally, defending the woman he loved, for if he fell she would most likely die too. The spin was his skill, using his body weight combined with short stature, knowledge of how gravity works (and using that to his advantage), and strength to rapidly spin himself in circles without getting dizzy, keeping his duel blades out, one in front and one behind his back, to literally create a spinning blade out of his body. Among the newbies he was often called "the amazing spinning midget," a term he much disliked, but it was almost humorous whenever Hanji called him it.

Titan after titan fell to his blades, and Hanji could only stare in awe. This was the man she was planning to marry, sometimes it still amazed her just how skilled he was. She was known to most as being "the crazy scientist obsessed with studying titans" and so to the public that was all she was, not the person who had a higher ranking in the Scouting Legion than "Humanities Strongest Soldier" captain Levi. He too had become a title, and that title required him to hide emotions for public face, but as he fought off these titans to protect her there was clearly anger on his face, and hidden underneath, worry, concern, for her, but he had learned to hide his feelings so that he could become a symbol instead of staying a man.

15 meter class, 7 meter, 3 meter, two 12 meters, four 3 meters, three 8 meters, five abnormals ranging from 10 meters to 17 meters, it seemed he was impossible to kill. Titans kept falling, and for once he didn't stop to get annoyed at the blood and guts splattering onto him, he had to keep fighting since Hanji was unable to, at least until the rest of the squads came.

He kept fighting, the titans were disappearing, there was maybe 3 left. Then two. Then one. Then-

Then...

Then…

He was out of blades.

And stuck in the hands of a titan, the last titan in the area.

Being raised to the mouth.

Hanji let out a scream.

"LEVI!?"

Hanji pulled herself up despite the pain, launched, and killed the titan, making it to another roof. She passed out from that last exertion, but not before saying, "I still owe you a wedding, you can't die yet, you can't die here, I-I was always going to be the one to die first because of how reckless I was. You-you can't die here Levi, not here."

There was a silent tear on her sleeping injured face.

**end part one**

Some cannot bear such painful memories, and so find other ways to shut them out. With a bump on the head it would be easy to forget.


	2. Chapter 2

(**A/N**: This is my first time writing Erwin so please give helpful tips as to how to write him better, as for me right now he is hard to write, it would be much appreciated)

She was found, passed out, on that very rooftop, more titans slowly coming closer. Those were dispatched quickly, and she was put on a cart. Levi was nowhere to be found, but people refused to assume the worst.

**part two**

"It's been five days Moblit, she hasn't woken up yet, each day the chances would normally get slimmer."

"I know Mike, and here I was always thinking she would get eaten by one of those titans she was always experimenting on."

"We still don't know what happened to Captain Levi either, if she would just wake up we could find out."

Hmm. It was these two voices again, she was often hearing them when she could hear anything. One was named Moblit and the other Mike, the names sounded familiar but she couldn't place them, nor the voices. She didn't remember this Captain Levi person they kept mentioning either, really almost everything was kinda a blur. Bits and pieces of her past were available, enough to know her name was Hanji, she studied titans for the Survey Legion, and had a high position, but not much else. She could not hear for long, it went in and out, and opening her eyes was out of the question right now, same with moving, but she figured she was probably in a hospital, with no clue how she got there.

The energy she had exerted to hear that one snippet of conversation took its toll and she fell back into sleep again.

Oh, there were voices again. She heard them as if listening through water, and focused to bring them to attention.

"7 days and counting, her condition at least seems to be getting better, but at this rate she won't ever wake up." It was that one person, Moblit, she thought. He seemed to be talking to himself.

This was frustrating, hearing but being unable to pin the voice with a face, unable to sit up and look at them. So, with all her might, she forced her eyes open, and took in what was indeed a hospital room, a nurse, and a light blond haired man standing next to her bed. The lights were blindingly bright and she blinked rapidly to try and make her eyes adjust.

"Hanji!? Are you awake?" The man (Moblit) said.

"Uuuugh, yeah, if this is what awake is." She said, feeling very stiff but at least fully aware.

"You have been asleep for 7 days, what happened?"

"I-I don't really know."

"What about Captain Levi though? What happened to him?"

"Who?" She tilted her head curiously.

Before she could hear his response however her ears so rudely decided to stop working, and her eyes refused stubbornly to stay open, so she contented herself to falling back asleep.

"I swear Erwin, she woke up! She spoke to me and looked at me, we had a conversation!" It was that person, Moblit again. He was talking this time to someone named Erwin. She had heard the name somewhere before, probably in one of Moblit's talks with Mike.

"Really? Well then, did she say anything about Captain Levi?" Erwin, or at least the person she assumed was Erwin, said.

"I asked if she remembered what had happened and she said no, then I asked if she remembered specifically what happened to Captain Levi, and she asked me who that was…"

At this point either silence was consuming the room or her hearing had gone out again, but she was fairly sure that it was the former. Eventually though noise was made from one of them, Moblit.

"Maybe it is the fact that she is still in and out of consciousness, and couldn't recall the name at the moment due to having not fully recovered."

"Maybe…" Though by Erwin's voice here Hanji could assume that she was supposed to recognize this name, Levi whatever, instantaneously.

No use pondering it for now though, she thought, it would be much better to sleep and recover faster than trying to decode that. So with that she drifted off to sleep again.

She bolted upright suddenly, and looked around. There was a blond man by her this time.

"So, you're awake then, for once when I am in here too." It was that man, Erwin's, voice, and it had a vague hint of humor.

"Yeah, I am awake, and if I have overheard conversations correctly then you must be Erwin." She hoped she had gotten that right.

"So you don't recognize me then, after hearing from Moblit as to how you reacted to the name Levi I figured as much." He turned to the nurse, who was silently sitting in the corner. "I am sure that you can mark Miss Zoe down as having amnesia."

"Amnesia?" Hanji tilted her head. It was not the first time she had heard that word, but she didn't realize she had it.

He turned back to her. "Yes, it has been a total of 10 days, and considering the fact that you do not recognize anyone, or the name Levi, I can be sure that you have amnesia, Hanji. And unless you remember what happened on that last mission outside the walls, during which you and Levi split from the main force to explore a side region, we will not know what happened during that mission, nor what became of Captain Levi."

"Who was this Captain Levi to me then? Must have been someone I was close to, and a strong soldier, if we were allowed to go exploring on our own by whoever the commander is."

"I am the commander currently, Commander Erwin. And yes, you two were close, though I am hoping that your memory comes back soon or I will tell you the circumstances of your relationship with Captain Levi, whom I can only assume is deceased at this point in time." He had a mask on, a mask concealing feelings, she could tell. This Levi figure must have been important to him too.

Before she could ponder this too long she yawned.

"Get some more rest Hanji, you are still in recovery, and if you are given enough time to heal chances are you might remember something. I will return later, when I have time." He turned and exited the room, leaving me with no choice but to sleep.

**end part 2**

Ghosts can lurk, they can observe the world as it is, see what is happening to their loved ones. Ghosts cannot interact with the living world however, and must suffer the pains of watching if they choose to stay behind.


	3. Chapter 3

Ghosts are people who have unresolved problems in the living realm and choose to stay behind, however they cannot do anything to resolve those problems on their own.

**part 3**

Watching as she woke up was a silent figure in the dark. He watched every time she woke up, he could tell each time she became conscious but not fully awake. Her breathing patterns changed ever so slightly. He listened to the words that were said by her and those around her, but never was able to get his words across. He was overlooked by everyone, unnoticed, invisible, but he would not leave her side, there was nothing else he could do anymore anyways.

He spoke, but his words were never heard, after all what sort of ghost could interact with the living? He spoke anyways though, thinking aloud and wishing he were heard, or at least he did it to comfort himself since no one else could.

"So, now your memory is as bad as your eyesight shitty glasses, it was probably all those hits your head took. Though what the scouting legion will do with its mad scientist currently amnesiatic is beyond me, you're the one who thinks outside the box and always manages to liven up the place with your crazy experiments and lack of respect for order." He was sitting between the wall and her body, back against that wall. He had not left her side once, no need to now that he was dead, he figured.

It really was a sad thought, her not remembering him, but he was sure that she would bounce back in no time, she always did, no matter how much she took or who died, she would spring back up and be her usual self in no time. Then again, he knew that wasn't true, he had found her in those sleepless nights, those times of nightmares, he knew that she held everything that happened within her and didn't bounce back as seamlessly as she made it seem.

"You know, shitty glasses, you should recover soon, I won't let you just lay in here all day and night you know? Sleeping your days away is rather unhealthy, and you are filthier than usual." He sighed, knowing that he would not be heard but wishing anyways.

It was then Erwin came in.

"Ah good, commander, maybe you can get her up, after all she needs to do something besides sleep, last time you were here she woke up too."

To his surprise, Erwin did just that. "Wake up Hanji."

"Emmmuh? Whaaaa?" She sat up and looked at Erwin. Such messy hair Levi thought.

"You are being released from the hospital due to the fact that all of your injuries have healed, though you will be required to check in every so often due to your amnesia. You have been in here for 13 days."

"Have I? Hmm, well I suppose I must be taking up space that other soldiers need, it would have been logical to release me earlier really." This made Levi a bit angry for some reason.

"Hanji, you idiot, before today you wouldn't have been able to stand properly, you were healing, so naturally they wouldn't release you." Huffed Levi in frustration.

Unaware of Levi's scolding, Erwin spoke, "Hanji, you would have previously healing, pushing yourself too hard would have made it worse and made you stay here longer. I am here to escort you to your room as I assume you do not remember where it is."

Erwin offered Hanji a hand up, and while he was thinking that it should be Levi tending to Hanji, Levi was wishing that he could. She took Erwin's hand though and stood, allowing him to lead her through the castle to her room, with the unnoticed Levi trailing close behind.

The first thing Hanji noticed upon entering her room was a picture in a nice frame sitting on her bed stand. She walked over to it and picked it up.

"Who is this shorty in the picture next to me? He looked irritated and grumpy."

"Ah, that is his usual face, but he was probably a bit happier than usual, you just tend to annoy him sometimes, that is Captain Levi." Erwin said.

"I wasn't aware you still _had_ that picture shitty glasses, it was taken ages ago, you were giving me bunny ears, joking about how I was as short as a rabbit. I made a remark about your obsession with titans and you just grinned taking it as a compliment, you always managed to annoy me by doing that but it was rather enjoyable really, our back and forth pokes at each other." Reminiscing again, he thought, hmm, being dead seems to make you do that a lot.

"Really? That is Captain Levi? Not what I was expecting from what you said about him, though I guess that just shows how bad my memory is if I don't even remember this picture getting tak-" She stumbled backwards, holding her head as if in pain. Both Levi and Erwin rushed to try and catch her, but while Levi was quick enough she fell right through him, and Erwin was too slow so she fell to the floor.

"Aaah, ah, my head, it huuurts!" She wouldn't stop holding it, and so Erwin bent down to make sure that she was okay while Levi wished he could do something, anything at all.

"What is it shitty glasses? You alright?"

"Are you okay Hanji?"

Levi and Erwin spoke at the same time, though Hanji only looked up at Erwin. "I, I think I will be fine, but, I remember what was happening when that picture was taken now. It, it must have triggered my memories, by looking at it. It was a nice memory, that much I can tell, everyone around was smiling, even Levi, under that annoyed face of his."

"That's right Hanji, I was smiling, though I suppose you were the only one that could actually tell, considering how well you can just read me, and find my emotions written all over my face, to you that mask of mine never existed." He sighed, frustrated at death in general. He had always said that he would accept his death when it came, but now he didn't want to, only when he actually had something to live for did he die. How ironic he thought.

"I wouldn't be able to tell, you were always the best at reading his emotions, he kept a mask on most times. And I wasn't there either so I wouldn't know the scene." Erwin said. "Anyways, if your head hurts too much you should lay down and sleep, I figure that even though your body is recovered your mind still has a long ways to go."

"Alright, good idea." She climbed into her bed and laid down, from what Levi could tell she was out like a light. The walk to her room had probably tired her out a lot considering she was still recuperating, and regaining memories seemed to take its toll on her too. He settled down into a chair in that room, and watched over her like a faithful guard dog, watching the rise and fall of her chest, consoling himself that even if he couldn't interact with her at least she was still alive, and hopefully had much more life to live.

**end part 3**

Poltergeists are much different from ghosts. Poltergeists are the ones that can move objects, though it requires a lot of willpower and mental strength, determination and a goal.


	4. Chapter 4

A ghost can become a poltergeist if the right circumstances arise

**part 4**

Days passed, weeks even, and memories slowly came. But none more involving Levi.

"Oh! There was this one time when I was a child when I was nearly run over by a cart! Jeez that hurt, I can almost feel it now."

"I remember meeting Mike for the first time, he sniffed me, but then stopped. I suppose it is because I smelt of lab chemicals, not a very good thing to breath in if you have an acute nose."

"The day that Moblit was assigned as my assistant! That was a fun one! He nearly had a heart attack whenever I did anything, tried to drag me out of my lab at least 4 times a day, 3 to eat and one to sleep, eventually gave up and fell back to once every day or two."

"Umph!" and here she finished chewing, "The day I joined the scouting legion! It was raining, but I didn't care, I got to join and meet all of my new squad members! Sorta like with my first day of training, I got shouted at but it was rather fun in a way!"

"Hmm, that was when I discovered my urge to study titans instead of just hunting them. I had decided to kick one of the severed heads and had found it much lighter than possible. Previously I had been fueled by rage, consumed by it, I wanted to take out every last titan in existence or die trying. Now though, because of that I study these titans and attempt to learn more about them. I figure people say that I am weird or traitorous for my interest in titans but really this is a valuable project isn't it?"

No matter what though, no more memories of her time spent with Levi surfaced. It seemed that the only memory that made her head hurt was that one involving him too. If he could punch through walls he was pretty sure he would. Give him some titans and he would slaughter all of them to cool off. Funny thing about being dead, it gave Levi more time and ways to express emotions, he didn't have to live up to and become a title anymore, he was just Levi.

The day of the planned wedding came, but she didn't notice. She didn't wash her hair like she had promised.

"Come on shitty glasses, you told me that you would wash your hair today, it is our wedding day after all. I said if you did I would arrange a mission to capture some titans for you. You owe me a wedding, and that debt was supposed to be paid today, with clean hair." This frustrated Levi to no end, and it hurt a bit. He had been hoping that maybe, just for once, something would slip in and she would remember to wash her hair, if for no reason other than just because she wanted to that day, on the surface at least. She had promised, she always kept her promises, always, so why did she have to break this one? He wandered off to another part of headquarters to see, just briefly, how others were faring, but if he had stayed he would have seen her shower, and for seemingly no reason other than boredom and wanting to, she had washed her hair nice and thoroughly. When he came back, he didn't notice, she had already gotten it messy and dirty again.

Then came that one day. Her first expedition outside the walls since she had lost her memories. The setting of the battle was that abandoned town which was where her memories had been lost, but no one told her that.

"YAHOO!" she shouted, swinging around and attacking the titans with a grin on her face, goggles securely in place. One after another fell to her blades, but Levi could tell that she was using too much gas, being reckless, more so than usual. Then it sputtered and went out.

She fell.

She managed to use her gear to secure a safe landing, breaking no bones and only gaining minor scratches.

Everyone else was distracted, there were titans everywhere, and they were too busy cutting them down to notice that Hanji was out of gas and far from the supply carts. She weaved in and out between titans, counting on others to kill them as she headed to those carts, hoping to make it in time.

"Come on shitty glasses, you can make it to that damned supply cart, it's not that far away anymore." Encouraging her seemed like the only thing to do, even if it fell on deaf ears.

Sadly though, she was stopped by a titan in front of her, and so close to the supply carts too. Moblit saw this though and kept that titan busy, allowing her to continue. If not for the titan behind her that was. It reached down, extending a hand to pick her up.

"HANJI!" Fuck no! Levi refused to let her get caught now, refused to let her die merely by being eaten. He hurled himself at her body, forgetting the fact that he was merely a ghost.

"GET OUT OF THE WAY OF THAT HAND SHITTY GLASSES!"

Hanji turned around, sensing the hand coming, but it was too late to get out of the way.

And then.

Push.

She somehow avoided the gigantic hand that had previously been bearing down upon her. For some reason she had also fallen on her ass and was about 30 feet away from where the hand had smacked down.

It had happened in under a second, but Moblit had seen, oh he had seen alright. The way he would later describe it would be, "It was as if she had just been pushed down, but not down per say, not up either, more like sideways, it was if she had temporarily flown and then landed safely."

In any case, she managed to reach the supply carts quickly after that, Moblit guarding her back. She refueled and got back out there to fight. Meanwhile, Levi was stuck staring at his hands because he had just pushed Hanji out of the way of a titan's hands. Ghosts should not be able to shove people, much less 30 feet away from where they were originally.

**end part 4**

Some poltergeists can be dubbed "guardian angels" by the living, while others will be called "evil spirits," it all depends on the poltergeist's emotions and will when interacting with the living realm.


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: **Sorry it is taking me so long to update all of my fics, but you see I am in school, so things get a bit delayed sometimes, along with the fact that I have more fic ideas than I can handle currently. I will update as quickly as possible though.))

Dreams are powerful things.

**part 5**

Hanji got back to the HQ safely, to which Levi was quite relieved about, still confused over how he had managed to push her out of the way of the titan. He figured that maybe he wasn't a ghost but a poltergeist, he had read books involving poltergeists before, and they were the ones that could interact with the living world somewhat, but it almost unheard of for one to be able to directly push a human around, the contrast between dead and living seemingly too great. To test this he tried picking up and moving objects all around the castle for the next few days, sometimes it worked and sometimes it didn't, but at least he got to see surprise on the faces of others at random objects casually floating around, it was worth it.

Eventually Levi returned to watching Hanji, a rather interesting thing to do now that he was dead, but instead of being a ghost he was a poltergeist. At least now he knew that he could watch over her when she got into troublesome situations, which he knew happened all too often, far too much for his liking at least. It seemed that she still had not recovered any memories of him though, instead she was regaining memories of her life in the Scouting Legion, but anything relating to him was being left out.

"You know shitty glasses, it would be less painful on my part if you just remembered me, it would be a lot nicer than just sitting around watching you or saving your ass time and time again." He sighed, she was sleeping currently, at least that was better than spending countless nights in her lab as she tended to do.

After a bit she started to toss and turn in her sleep, sweating and panicking, and he figured that she was having a nightmare. It was nothing out of the ordinary for anyone in the Scouting Legion, but it still pained him to see her in this state. What pained him even more was when she started to cry out and mutter words in her sleep. Specifically, something involving his name.

"Levi...no...no Levi, I'm sorry."

He froze. Not once since he had died had he heard her speak his name with such familiarity. He had been perched on her bed, but when he heard his name Levi bent over her body to look at her face.

"Hanji?" He said her name, knowing it was pointless to do so but feeling the need to anyways. He kept forgetting how little he could do in death, and it was still frustrating. He moved to touch her forehead anyways, to attempt to awaken her, but when his skin came in contact with her forehead something else happened.

Suddenly he was standing back in that abandoned town, the one where he had died, only this time he was already dead. This time he could see what Hanji had seen, and see what she had done afterwards.

He took the steps needed to where she was, finding her right where she had been when the titan caught him. He could hear her shouts, see her tears, and determination. As she stood to go kill the titan, she was nearing tears, so Levi put a hand on her shoulder.

"Relax."

Hanji rapidly turned around to face him. "Huh, Levi? But you were just over there.."She motioned to where the titan had been, but it faded away, and they were both surrounded in a sort of yellow glow.

"You're dreaming shitty glasses," he sighed. "That already happened, more than two months ago. That's why this is a nightmare." Levi hated having to explain this to her, but he needed to, because if this was her subconscious then at least it showed that she still remembered him.

"Dead? Then how are you here? Especially in my head, just a figment of my nightmare still, to make me think you really did die?" She laughed madly for a moment. "What then? If you really are dead and it has been two months, why am I not recalling those months? Surely I should be able to now that I am aware that I am dreaming."

"Hanji, you hit your head pretty hard, twice, once when you got attacked by the titan, and the second time was when you tried to kill the titan that was about to eat me, surely you, a scientist, knows what head and emotional trauma does to people. Currently, in the waking world, you have amnesia. You are slowly gaining your memories back, and yet you don't remember a thing about me, your mind trying to protect you from remembering my death I guess."

She didn't speak for a bit, but when she did, it was with an _odd_ tone. "Then how are you still here? Speaking to me, dead people tell no stories after all, not by themselves at least."

"Well, apparently, if someone dies with too many unresolved matters, they get to stick around a bit." Levi then hugged her softly, kissing her forehead. "Now wake up shitty glasses, it is nearly noon."

"But if what you are saying is true, that I have amnesia, then if I wake up I forget you again."

"Out there, when you wake up, I will just be your guardian angel, but if I figure out how to speak to you again, I will, for now though, I think you have left your duties alone for too long." He sighed. It was nice being able to talk to her for once, but he also knew that she would have to wake up sometime, better now than later in his mind, saves the trouble of explaining everything that had been going on to her right now.

"Alright, just, if I don't remember soon, come visit me here in my dreams again please."

"Of course, we owe each other a wedding after all, and amnesia is not an excuse for missing it."

"Neither is death, clean freak." She grinned at him, and he quickly memorized the exact way it formed on her face, teeth showing, eyes crinkling, and cheeks pushed upright, she was even more beautiful than usual when that smile was directed at him.

**end part 5**

She woke up, confused and disorientated, but having slept much better than most nights before, he removed himself from her dream feeling happier and more content than he had since death.


End file.
